STUPID QUESTIONS

Often, when I facilitate board or staff retreats, we start with an ice-breaker.  Because I do not enjoy playing games (even though I know it’s not really about me), I try to keep it simple.  Especially if we are limited in time, the go to ice breaker I end up with is to ask them to introduce themselves—name, how long they’ve been involved with the organization, and then to answer a question, all in less than a minute (hoping we end up not going over 2!).  The one question I often ask is What is one thing you wish someone had told you earlier?

It’s interesting to hear what people say.  For a long time, my answer would have been that you can choose to be happy.  For so long—like too many perennial teenagers—I was into trauma, drama, angst.  But then I discovered that, really, I could just be happy, and it was nothing short of a revelation.

Now, however, I think I would say that the one thing I wish someone had told me earlier (and that I could have believed!),  is that the only stupid question is the one you don’t ask.

There are so many places where this is true, but (as always) I often consider it with a fundraising lens.

Too often, nonprofits decide what they want donors to give their money for.  Often this makes sense—you are mailing letters to thousands of people, and so you cannot ask each one what they particularly want to support.  But think how compelling it would be to thank a donor for their generosity and ask them , “What made you contribute today?”

Certainly, only a few would respond, but those who do will be those you will be able to count on for years to come.  And may be those for whom your organization is so important that they may make a major gift and/or leave a significant legacy.

If you are meeting a donor either in person, on the phone or videoconference, think what you can ask them rather than what you should pitch.

Tell me what we mean to you goes a lot further than let me tell you what we want.  If you’ve already had that conversation, build on it.  Instead of “you’ve told me that….and so I am asking you to….” build upon the conversation.

Above all, ask your donors questions. And remember, the only stupid one is the one you fail to ask>